Beachheads and battles

As for me,
I trust myself entirely to the One
who desired to save me,
knew the way to do it,
and had the Power to carry it out.
Bernard of Clarivaux

This was a quote that was included in today's Lent Devotional by Ty Saltzgiver. What a succinct articulation of my experience as I have walked with God. And as I look back on the journey, I realize the great mystery involved in the saving. God took advantage of every little small foothold I gave him and turned it into something so much more than my feeble heart was willing to yield at that time. He has taken the lunches I have offered up over the years--sometimes willing, sometimes begrudgingly, sometimes in desperation--and miraculously turned them into feasts of epic porportion. And many (if not most) of the times I never really saw it happening...I just looked back and realized that it was there! Ty gives the following illustration and it certainly fits with this experience:

"What little I know about the battles of WWII fought island by island goes like this: The enemy held the island. Bombs would soften the enemy for our attack and entry. The marines would land and establish a 'beachhead'. Then, eventually they'd take over the island. When the Marines established their 'beachhead', they had control of 5% (or less) of the real estate of the island, yet they would radio, 'The Marines have landed; and the situation is well in hand'. The love of Christ in our hearts and our surrender to Love's control seems much the same way. Knowing Jesus loves you (He died for you and me) may have only a beachhead in our heart, but with our prayer and desire combined with the Holy Spirit's persistent attack, Christ's love moves over the island of our heart and life...."

The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still.
Exodus 14:14

...I broke the bars of your yoke and enabled you to walk with heads held high.
Leviticus 26:13

This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us
and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins.
I John 4:10

Jesus sought me when a stranger,
Wandering from the fold of God;
He, to rescue me from danger,
Interposed His precious blood;
How His kindness yet pursues me
Mortal tongue can never tell,
Clothed in flesh, till death shall loose me
I cannot proclaim it well.
Come Thy Fount of Every Blessing
Robert Robinson

Peace on Earth!

This is a close-up of the mural in the church at Bethpage.
You can read the caption below for more information.
An interesting aspect of the mural to note is the disciple
shrouded in a cloak. The artist intended this to represent each of
us as we participate in the celebration of Jesus' entry into Jerusalem.

In my devotional today I learned something new about Jesus' "triumphal" entry into Jerusalem four days before his crucifixion. As many of us have read year after year, Jesus asked his disciples to bring him a donkey for this trek. Here is what I learned. Ty explains that "many have said that the donkey is a lowly creature and Jesus' ride signified again his humility and his never grasping at an earthly title or position" and this would certainly be in keeping with what intuitively has made sense to me over the years and what I have heard others comment about regarding this section. However, Ty explains that "a study of the historical context reveals the donkey (ass, foal, or colt) is really a noble beast and a king might well have ridden on one before a crowd symbolizing, 'I come in peace'. Zechariah foretold of this ride in just such a way (9:9), 'Behold, your king is coming to you... riding on a donkey.' Jesus rode in peace, appealing for a rightful throne, yes; but not a throne of this world, rather to be enthroned in our hearts." The devotional then goes on to reflect on this notion of peace and what this means in our lives. From the earliest public announcement of Jesus' birth with angels proclaiming "Peace on Earth!" to the beginning of the final chapter, the message that Jesus brings us peace is emphasized. Jesus shares in John 14:26-27 that "the Counselor, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you all things and will remind you of everything I have said to you. Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid." Peace for our souls, our spirits, our minds, our hearts....

As I seek that kind of peace in my life, where I am truly looking for it? Is it in my possessions, my work, my relationships with friends and family, or my various forms of entertainment? If so, I will always come up empty in the end, because these are all given "as the world gives." Instead, the most important question is if I am seeking true peace from the One who offers it. Am I giving Jesus "the throne of my heart" that He might usher in this peace? Oh, that it be so.

Bethpage is located on the Mount of Olives where Jesus requested the disciples to get him the donkey to ride into Jerusalem on what we now celebrate as Palm Sunday. The church here houses a stone that tradition says served as the spot from which Jesus mounted the colt.

Ash Wednesday

I almost lost track that today is Ash Wednesday and I am so glad that God gently reminded me because I would have been disappointed to have missed this divine appointment or shown up late for it. This is a very special Lenten Season to me! If you scroll back in my blog and check out entries made in late July and early August, you will find the "whole story" of why I felt God prompting me to have a Lenten Celebration at that time of the year. What I didn't know then was that I was pregnant. Ben and I found out on August 7th that this little one we now know as Carter had begun being "knit" together by God several weeks earlier. We went from 40 days of Lent to 40 weeks of pregnancy! To then go in for that first ultrasound and find out that the due date we and the doctor's office were working off of was being changed to....you guessed it, Easter Sunday??? What an awesome thing! So, here we are full circle of sorts at Lent. It is my intention on this pass to do a better job sticking to my Lenten commitment of daily reading in the devotional I started then--"40 Days of Lent: Scripture and Reflections on Jesus' Passion, Death, and Resurrection"by Ty Saltzgiver. With all the excitement and distraction of learning we were pregnant, I wasn't exactly as focused as I had hoped to be on the last attempt. So, with joy and expectation I enter this time of preparation for the Easter celebration of Christ's passion for each us. And throughout this all, I remain and will continue to be amazed by God's design and the intimate ways in which He enters our lives when we allow.

And little Carter just gave a kick of exclamation!

Spring is around the corner

What an exciting spring this will be! Time has flown by with this pregnancy and I have enjoyed almost every moment. I am getting really excited to finally meet this little girl that is ever-present but still such a mystery. I was surprised last weekend to find the bulbs I planted in November beginning to poke through the mulch in the beds. Everybody is gearing up for Carter's arrival and Mom and Dad could not be more thrilled.

Even my Mom is getting ready for the grandbaby's arrival.
This picture was taken just before Christmas in the mountains.
She is working on a beautiful blanket for the baby. I
just love how the flexible knitting needles automatically formed
the shape of a heart. Very appropriate!

Anticipation

I just love that this little baby will be born in April. Having enjoyed April birthdays myself for the last 38 years, you feel like all of creation is joining you in celebration--the world feels like a party with flowers blooming on trees, bushes, and in the yard! April is an explosion of color and new life. It makes so much sense to me that God would design the celebration of Passover and thereby ordain the resurrection of His son during this time of the year. It is a time when the earth speaks of life after the death of Fall and the dormant Winter. So, with a sense of anticipation, I planted daffodil bulbs in our yard today. It was getting dark entirely too early as it does this time of the year and the air is cool. The grass is dying and turning the yucky shade of brown that will blanket the neighborhood for the next several months. And here I am stuffing these awkward looking brown bulbs into chilly earth. And I just smile inside when I think about our own little private celebration for this new member of the family come April. What better welcome than the happy daffodil?

I wandered lonely as a cloud
That floats on high o'er vales and hills,
When all at once I saw a crowd,
A host, of golden daffodils;
Beside the lake, beneath the trees,
Fluttering and dancing in the breeze.

Continuous as the stars that shine
And twinkle on the milky way,
They stretched in never-ending line
Along the margin of a bay:
Ten thousand saw I at a glance,
Tossing their heads in sprightly dance.

The waves beside them danced, but they
Out-did the sparkling leaves in glee;
A poet could not be but gay,
In such a jocund company!
I gazed—and gazed—but little thought
What wealth the show to me had brought:

For oft, when on my couch I lie
In vacant or in pensive mood,
They flash upon that inward eye
Which is the bliss of solitude;
And then my heart with pleasure fills,
And dances with the daffodils.
(William Wordsworth)

Morning coffee

It has been a while since I have written, but my heart and mind have been so full. After returning from an amazing trip to Israel, I nervously made it through a few milestones in the pregnancy. I am now almost 17 weeks and the first trimester is behind me. We had an amazing ultrasound at the 12 week mark and I was astounded by what we were able to see. Little hands, a round belly, and a precious profile delight two new parents. In the midst of it all, work has been very busy and my folks have moved to a new nest in the NC Mountains, which is where I am at this moment. While sitting on the deck watching the sun rise over the mountains, you can't help but reflect. My mind wanders like the visible warmth drifting up from my coffee cup, which by the way,is a perfect companion this cold morning excepting the fact that it is decaf! So my wandering mind settles for a time on work...

Let me share a work story as it is in its simplicity the heart of who Bethany Christian Services is. There is a young woman who discovered she was pregnant not too long ago and she knew then that she was not prepared to provide adequately for this little one. Bethany exists to give women true choices…ways to choose to honor the life that God has created even when circumstances make that choice seem impossible. She began working with Bethany to find a family who is ready to be the parents to this child in ways that she bravely recognized she could not at this time. Her little girl was born not too long ago and for what reason we will never understand, she was born with only the stem of her brain. The rest of the area where her brain should have been was filled with empty fluid. As the brain stem controls the basic functions of life, this little one would survive for some amount of time, whether it was days or months no doctor could say. Here is where you see the heart of Bethany. Many other adoption agencies would have nothing more to do with this situation…the complexities are numerous and clearly finding a family prepared to be parents in this situation become much more difficult. But if we truly believe that God is the author of life and nothing created by him is anything less than wonderful and amazing, why would we see this little one any differently? Emotionally overwhelmed, the young mom felt that continuing with her decision to place this little one in Bethany’s care was the right decision. Over the days that followed, much prayer, concern, tears, and smiles were lavished on this little girl and she was fought for and advocated for as any parent would for cherished life. Bethany continued to search for the family who would respond to God’s call to be parents to this little one for whatever time God gave her and staff and volunteers surrounded her crib with their loving presence throughout the days. One volunteered shared of singing over her while cradling her in her arms for hours one evening and it made me think of Zephaniah’s words, “The Lord your God is mighty to save. He will quiet you with His love. He will rejoice over you with singing.” The Lord was mighty to save and he took his daughter home with Him several days ago. At the time of this beautiful transition from life to death to eternal life, this little girl was surrounded by her new family as well as her grandmother who was there holding hold her during those final moments. We will never know how God used this baby’s short life but we are confident that He did. God brings beauty out of the ashes. He breathes redemption into a fallen and imperfect world. His purposes are never thwarted. I am humbled that I get to be a part of this Kingdom work that God advances through Bethany.